SOME OF MURPHY'S LAWS

ANTHONY’S LAW OF FORCE
Don't force it, get a larger hammer

CANN'S AXIOM
When all else fails, read the instructions

CANADA BILL JONES ' SUPPLEMENT
A Smith and Wesson beats four aces

MURPHIES FOURTH LAW
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will do the most damage will be the one to go wrong

FRANKLIN'S RULE
Blessed be he who expects nothing for he shall not be disappointed

NARVARD LAW
Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases

HELLER’S LAW
The first myth of management is that it exists

HOARE'S LAW OF LARGE PROGRAMS
Inside every large program is a small program struggling to get out

JOHN'S COLLATERAL COROLLARY
In order to get a loan, you must first prove that you don't need it

JONES' LAW
The man who can smile when thing's go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on

JONES’ MOTTO
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate

LAW OF SELECTIVE GRAVITY (BUTTERED SIDE DOWN LAW)
An object will fall so as to do the most damage

LOWERY'S LAW
If it jams ... force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway

DEAN MARTIN'S DEFINITION OF DRUNKENNESS
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on

MESKINEN'S LAW
There's never time to do it right, but always time to do it over

MURPHY'S THIRD LAW
In any field of scientific endeavour, anything that can go wrong will go wrong

MURPHY'S LAW OF THERMODYNAMICS
Things get worse under pressure

NINETY NINETY RULE OF PROJECT SCHEDULES
The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten takes the other ninety percent

O’TOOLE’S COMMENTARY ON MURPHY’S LAW
Murphy was an optimist

PUDDER’S LAW
Anything that begins well ends badly
Anything that begins badly ends worse

RULE OF ACCURACY
when working toward the solution of a problem it always helps you to know the answer

SATTINGER'S LAW
It works better if you plug it in

SEVAREID'S LAW
The chief cause of problems is solutions

SHAW'S PRINCIPLE
Build a system that even can use and only
a fool will want to use it

SIMMON'S LAW
The desire for racial integration increases with the square of the distance from the actual event

STEEL 'S PLAGIARISM OF SOMEBODY'S PHILOSOPHY
Everyone should believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink